The Terrible Teacher


Put simply, it is insanely difficult to put it simply. I have tried in English, French, Spanish and even Python, Java and QBASIC, for all are languages, but I have failed, undeniably miserably, at expressing what I was expected to, upon being asked the question, which though, was strangely metamorphosed into a morbidly labyrinthine piece of literature, was proclaimed to be an integral part of my syllabus, by my teacher, who I have attributed with, the epithet of being terrible, in the Heading of this post. I have known people who are brick walls in accepting any creative answer and I have met people who are sewage pumps in framing questions, but never have I ever, encountered the miserable phenomenon of facing a person, who simultaneously belongs to those two categories.

Five minutes in, and I declared that I could not make any more sense with my sensible answer, than I am doing right now. And then I had to explain why, upon receiving a stimulus. And then I had to explain why I answer rhetorical questions, which after answering, I realised was itself a self-interrogatory rhetorical question! And since then, I have been answering…..

I know not, when I may Stop (breathing, for that is the only way this Viva could end!).

Arkadeep Mukhopadhyay
Editor-in-chief
Antarctica Daily
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Mango tree mysteriously bears bitter gourds after local people forcibly cut away some of its branches


30 February, 0065: Nature has been angered and here are the consequences. No more mango its just bitter gourd.

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What it was...:-)

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What it is and would be....:-(

Last day a group of people from a Sri Lankan village cut the branches of a mango tree which was known to bear the sweetest mango ever and donated them to a group of scientist who offered to manipulate its genes and create more mango trees like that with the payment of a nominal fee. The mango tree clearly declared that cutting branches wasn’t a deal, but people didn’t care. Today morning just as everyone went to the tree to pluck a few fruits, they were socked to see that all the yellow, red mangoes have been replaced with green pale bitter gourds.
This news teaches us that, Greed is the end of all good.😰😥😰:(😱😨

Arkadeep Mukhopadhyay
Editor-in-chief
Antarctica Daily
Website: http://www.antarcticadaily.weebly.com

Scientist calculates the modulus of zero while laughing out loud


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30 February, 0042: Very often in the history of science, had the most difficult questions been answered within seconds while doing seemingly unrelated tasks which in no way is related to science or, as Galileo said, it’s language, mathematics! Amazingly enough the answers to those typically difficult questions have been answered in terms of everyday experience instead of the use of mathematical symbols and logic. Maths professor Sir Dr Prof Calculus Calculator exemplified the above stated observation with unbelievably precise accuracy! He explained the nature of laughter using maths. He stated while laughing out loud, “Let 0 be a number, which it is. Applying the modulus function to it we get the answer zero, mathematically. But applying the function socially we get |0|=lol. Therefore, we understand the important action of laughter, which is nothing but a mathematical implication that modulus of zero is zero.” The reaction to this discovery has been quite mixed as some people have decided to award him the Nobel prize in both Maths and Psychology while others demanded a more rational proof of the proof.

Arkadeep Mukhopadhyay
Editor-in-chief
Antarctica Daily
Website: http://www.antarcticadaily.weebly.com