Lionel Messi hires Mathematician to keep track of his Trophy Cabinet

30 February 0082: Winning a Ballon D’Or is tough, winning it five times is tougher, keeping track of how many you won is simple very difficult or rather herculean.


Lionel Messi, arguably the best footballer in the world,  appointed a Cambridge Mathematics Lecturer to keep track of how many trophies he had won. In an interview Messi said,”I used my memory before, but it proved to be fruitless, I started using graph sheets, then spreadsheets but my trophy cabinet expanded faster than the Universe expanded. So I appointed Sir Prof Dr Factorial to keep a track of my trophies.”
Sir Prof Dr Factorial has already drawn following inferences to Messi’s crisis of goal crisis:-
1) Messi’s trophy winning function wrt time is a fifth order polynomial.
2) If Messi’s keeps on playing for 8 years, 352days and 21 hours 37 minutes 17.976 seconds he will own more trophies than humans on Earth.
3) Very soon he will own more gold that the entire human population combined in the form of trophies and medals.
4) Lastly, a little philosophically he added that if a poor boy can shock the world like Messi did, anything is possible. He even added mathematical evidences to his last statement, by stating that the probability of success if  Messi is your idol is about 0.9798899937375256… or almost 1! or 1 !

Arkadeep Mukhopadhyay
Antarctica Daily